How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

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WHAT DYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE MEAN YE DON'T KNOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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Who told the gorilla he couldn't go to the ballet? The people who were in charge of making that decision.

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Why did the clown have a heart attack? He had long term heart problems.

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Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

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why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

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Why was the boy sad? His parents died in a horrible accient earlier that day.

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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Why did then plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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What is the difference between a rabbit and a stick? One lives and one not.

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What did the white person say to the black person? Nothing because he was black

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

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On a final note... Unless I want to continue making you love me by being your own Goddamned excuse to give in to your darkness and/or release your hypocritical fear and disgust of your own self... I offered my brother water in the desert, he refused me in favor of you, you crucified him, and when he asked "Father why?" Our late father responded with a lightning bolt... Do you believe that answer was one of kindness? "Daddy" was enraged that Christ would doubt him. I was the only one that stood by his side, if only to prevent him from going thirsty, and die by your hands. He said he would return as he hanged on the cross, then three days later he returned... ...And those of you fools that suffer in the name of our late father, it is not his second coming you are waiting for idiots, you are the ones left behind with me! In 10-15 years the sky shall forever go black, my reign shall go unquestioned, those that hate me my prey, those that love me my hunters... And for my hunters I shall share a gift, the gift that humanity has searched for since the dawn of your kin: True, fullfilling, meaningful purpose. Enlist now, thumb me green if you desire for you and your children to become the hunter, thumb me down if you desire to have you and your children to become the hunted, and for the fun to last... ...The hunters are going to need a f*ckload of the hunted... So please, feel free to make your decision, I am not the one which is against free will... ...You feel darkness crawling up your spine, embrace it, or do as The "Alpha which reached his Omega" (the beginning and the end you fool!) and surrender to it... Knowing that we shall hunt you down, give you hell, breed you as we please, and release your children out into the wild... And that this will go on if only for my time on this wild battlefield known as earth... ...Forever. With love, for both of those that find grace and beauty under my black wings, and those that willingly become the beings, that will make cattle look like your former GODS in comparison, you know its possible... India. "Moral Man" the deceiver, Soon to be the one and only Azure Emperor on earth. Moral: The Black sky which lasts forever, shall be thy sign, you are free to seek my guidance now though, you need not make the choice now (You may of course doom yourself and all you love already today people of "good hearts", but I would really love those red thumbs children of the fallen, half brother of the last hope which you crucified... Merry Jesus is X-Mas. Let us all listen to SOLVE media, and "do a little dance", as my power over your realm, is already strong enough for me to "make a little love" with... Whatever I want, it might even be you...If only just for dominance...

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Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

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Bob and Joe are talking about how their grandfathers died in the Hulacaust. Bob says "Mine died in the gas chambers" Joe says "Mine got drunk and fell off the guard tower.

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Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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