mexicans fishing

Why is the ground wet It rained

What do you call a mother cow? Moooom

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

Why was the mushroom invited to the party? It was because it was a mushroom costume party

Poop.

The first cow: are you worried about mad cow disease? the second cow: no, im a helicopter

what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

A house comes around the corner.

What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

What's big, hard, in the water, and isolated? Shutter Island

What did the waiter say to an overweight customer? May I take your order?

- i send you a friend request on facebook - okay

What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

if ruddel jumped on your back what do you do leave him on or pull him offf? shoot him.

How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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