What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

5 Italian guys from Long Island

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

your mother is a well respected woman in society and makes delicious cookies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you steal candy from a baby? You ask nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Who hangs out with a girl all day every day while he's dating her for 4 months and still doesn't get his wiener touched. Adam claypool

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? Almost everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the girl crying? She prolapsed.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a naked couple? Horny.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

This is not funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's in the sky? Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's a helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black an white and red all over? Two dead babies, one African American and one Caucasian split in half by a chainsaw.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo. The prior sentence is a grammatically correct sentence in American English.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops