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Q:Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A:Sea creatures seeking shelter and food

Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? Cindy your neighbor. I was wondering if I could borrow some milk, I ran out.

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

There was a man and a woman. In a lodge all alone ready to create a child. instead of having sex he violently punched her in the face and stabbed her in her armpits until her loud screams for help had stopped.

A man walked into a bar. He was only 19, but technically a man. Underage drinking is not O.K.

why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practice

two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

Does 2 + 2 = fish? No.

Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? AIDS

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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