Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

human centipede

What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

roses are red violets are indigo

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

What's black and white and red all over? My dog after she was hit by a car (true story)

What's the mosy hardest game in the world? The Impossible Game.

You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

sky silverstein

Beached whale: "Look at me, I'm a land mammal"

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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