How do you turn that frown upside down? You move many muscles in your face.

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if yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs?

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When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

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One sunny Tuesday morning, Tom and his friends were outside playing at the park. Then, suddenly, a violent storm was rapidly approaching. It was recommended that everyone should seek shelter immediately.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A blind fish.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? A deer. The fact that it has no eyes doesn't change the species.

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Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding poo in your shoe.

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knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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I recently sent 10 puns to a joke website, hoping that one of them would win a competition. Unfortunately, they were deemed offensive.

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What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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If pro is the oppisite of con what is the oppiste of progress Congress

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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Your mamma's so dumb, she's had problems functioning in society, due to illiteracy problems, and a general incomprehension of her surroundings and own thoughts.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No reason.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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