What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

Knock knock. Who's there? The interrupting doctor. The inter-- --You have cancer.

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

Poop

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

www.xnxx.com

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? No Neither has he.

Whats worse then finding a winning lottery ticket? Probably Everything

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

What Did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh yeah... You're mute.

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

WOMENS RIGHTS

What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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