Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

Q:What is usually pink, brown or black, usually big and comes out smaller, which goes in and out of your mothers mouth? A: Could be lots of things really... Moral: But we all know what you imagined you sick bastard!

Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

What do you call sad communities that have to share resources? Communists.

Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

What do you do when you go downstairs in the middle of the night and see your VCR floating in the middle of the living room? Run and cower in fear in this seemingly impossible situation.

why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Steve" "Oh hey Steve, come on in"

Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

What happens when a fat guy falls ? Ohio has another earthquake.

Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

What's the difference between a black cat and a black cat? Nothing.

knock knock whos there cops o shit come on they found out about pot lets go

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

do you know what was a good idea? not last night

What's worse than being fat? Being gay

What's big and purple? Barney

Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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