There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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Hey babe, are you a refrigerator? -No... Good--'cause I wanna f*ck you so hard. Best pickup line. Always works.

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What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

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A white guy a black guy and a mexican are in a car and the car crashes and blowes up who dies? They all die cuz they all were in the car when it blew up

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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A redhead walks into a bar. The bartender asks him if he wants a drink. He says yes.

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What do you call a guy with alot of money? A rich guy.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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When life throws knives at you, run away.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

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It's April Fools Day... APRIL FOOLS!!!

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Why was was a black guy carrying a tv out of someone else's house. He was helping them move.

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why did the plane crash ? Because a loaf of brad was flying it, and Loaves of bread don't fly planes

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What do you call the Flintstones if they were black? N****rs

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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What do you call a lubia chin jew slave?

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Jamie stegman put many doodles into his mouth, sometimes 2,3 even 5.

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Where did the AIDS victim go on vacation? To the hospital.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops