Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

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What are the two words that once you hear, You will feel a sudden gush of euphoria followed by immense depression? The Game

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Why didn't the Mexican have a job? Because stereotypes made employers unjustly reluctant to hire a hard-working, competent man.

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How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

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Three nudists, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. No one finds it particuarly odd because the three are conscientious and wear appropriate clothing in public places.

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A penguin is driving through the desert when his car breaks down. He has it towed to a service station in the nearest town to be repaired. The mechanic tells him that it may be a while so he might want to take a stroll around town, find something to do for a while and check back a little later for an update. The penguin decides that as it is so hot in the desert town, and he is accustomed to a much cooler climate, he might enjoy a bit of ice cream. He walks to the local ice cream parlor, orders a large vanilla cone, and proceeds to devour the treat in a flash, covering himself in ice cream in the process. He has ice cream on his flippers, his face, and all down his stomach; he is virtually covered in the white, sticky goo. Upon returning to the service station to check in on the mechanic and his car, the mechanic say to him, "Well, it looks like the seal on your head gasket leaked, the transmission is shot, and you appear to be covered in ice cream." To which the penguin replies, "Yes, I have made quite the mess of myself. Today just isn't my day."

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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There once was a boy. On his birthday, he got a small puppy. The puppy was white and had big eyes. Boy loved his puppy and the puppy loved the boy.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven threatened six's family after insinuations of seven being a cannibal.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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A sloth walked into the dentists he was confused

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Why did the black woman have an affair? Because she had an unsatisfying sex life, her old husband was boring, and she was curious about being with other men.

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What do u call a bunch of white dudes siting on a bench ......the NBA

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what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babys taking them out with a pitchfork

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what does the sloth say to Jonah reincastle? nothing Jonah is the sloth

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How do you make a mess? Microwave a baby.

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I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

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What did one pig say to the other pig while sitting in the bathtub? No thanks I already have a typewriter.

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German bedtime story: There once was a boy who liked to suck his thumbs. His mother told him to stop, but he wouldn't. So she cut of his thumbs. Now he has none. Goodnight.

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hey justin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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