A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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Why does Chuck Norris own a can named Chuck Norris? because he is self-centered due to all the attention payed to him for virtually no reason at all.

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why did the kid raise his hand in class because he had a question

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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Why wouldn't Leena sleep with Ole? Because she thought him to be a dumb, ugly, Scandinavian.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, hence the name Violets.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My face isn't long relative to the others of my species, it is actually quite normal."

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What do you call a fish without an eye? A fsh

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

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Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

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Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

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When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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Knock, knock. Who is there? Child services, here to take your children. The following day, there is another knock at the door. Who is there? The police. The woman runs into the kitchen and kills herself.

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What's funnier than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Whats better than 7 babies tied to 1 tree 1 baby tied to 7 trees

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

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do,Nt loagh at me I has dislecqsia

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I may have Alzheimer's. But at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

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The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

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What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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