Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

Roses are gray Vilots are gray im a dog

bologna

THE GAME.

What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

you...

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

You decide, drink or drive. But don't do all 3 at the same time.

There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

Why did the jew kill himself? Because he had no foreskin.

A: Knock, Knock B: Whos there? A: Noone, the door and the visitor are both existential figments of your imagination.

Listen, I cannot as much as I would like, to take the full responsibility for every decision my former followers might decide to make of their own, we are no religion nor do we follow any kind of doctrines, we encourage freedom but also respect for our fellow human beings, all of them regardless of race or affiliation. But you let me know whoever has as much as looked at you the wrong way, and I will make sure they no longer find themselves welcome within my order, nor anywhere else if their actions merit the firm hands of justice.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

What is worse than finding a real joke on Anti-joke.com? Starving children in Africa.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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