What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has AIDS.

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What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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you...

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

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Why didn't the dinosaur cross the road. Because roads were not invented then dumbass.

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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what are three short words? i a am

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

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Why did the 2 black kids jump the barb-wired fence To get to the other side

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I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

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a suicidal man walks up 49 floors and enters a room and opens the window. hes worked there for 5 years and the air condition is broken

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Roses are red Violets are blue I need to go to the bathroom.

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Happy Birthday!! Have some meth cupcakes.

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Why does the Gay guy have a bell on his bike? Because its the only way his blind dog can follow him.

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure. Ok,

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops