A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse said nothing because it doesn't understand human language.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

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penis

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How do you get Vladamir Putin to smile? You tickle him.

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What time is it when an elephant steps on your watch? Time to go to the hospital and get treated for a shattered wrist.

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What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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What's johnny's favorite bedtime story? The sound of the subway. Johnny and his father are homeless and can't afford bedtime stories

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I was walking down the street then my hands were itchy so I stuck em in my pockets Jk, I'm a donkey. We don't have hands

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What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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Superman wears chuck Norris pajamas Just kidding superman is a fictional character and is uncapable Of owning pajamas

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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A black guy walks into a bar orders his drink and could not do it in a more civilized way

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What did the Black man say to the prostitute? Your job makes the risks of getting AIDs and other STDs much higher than the average person's.

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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Is your daddy a thief? Because he stole my wallet.

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how do you kill a blond? there are many ways but every one of them is illegal and could be criminally chargeable.

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Guest what? Dog

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whenever you come out of emma browns bedroom

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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What did the sad orphan with liver cancer get for Christmas? Pictures of dead babies to put things in perspective.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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