What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

thumb_up thumb_down +12

[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

whats worse than finding a worm in your penis having your wife bite of your penis and die from an infecction

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many licks did it take for the owl to get to the center of the tootsie roll tootsie pop? A: Since when did owls have tounges?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +10

23

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Actually, 6's fear was totally irrational, and thus unexplainable. This sort of fear is generally referred to as a phobia.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do gay kittens eat? Cat food. Friskies and Fancy Feast are both popular brands.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The chicken"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops