What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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One of my nipples is a different colour from the other two. Is this normal? The Doctor replied with the answer no and said you have cancer

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Trees are black, WHO BURNT MY GARDEN?!

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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What did it say on the banner for an international dyslexics support group? Dyslexics of the world unite.

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what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

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Life is like a box of chocolates. The worst ones remind you of how horrible your life is.

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Whats worse the people posting real jokes on (Anti Jokes)? 911

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Liverpool City Football Club

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Roses are red, Bacon is also red. Poems are hard, Bacon.

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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What's long, hard and full of semen? An erect penis prior to ejaculation.

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What happened when my familys break on the car didn't work? They rolled down a hill and fell off a cliff and died. I loved them.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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There's 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and muscular guy. 7 days later, the fat guy receives an invitation to the zoo. It turns he got a new job and his friends was so proud.

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Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

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Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

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why are anti jokes so funny? cuz u pobably just laughed at this one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gays house! knock knock who's there? The chicken!

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What is white, black, and red all over? A: A zebra being slaughtered.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on the training and hence productivity of the babies.

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Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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