How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

what do u call a black persons face? a black persons face...

What does a shortstop do when the ball is by third base? He leaves the field to go to the hospital, his little sister just had a heart attack.

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

My name is Corey, and I am Dickbang Majestic. Q: Who is Dickbang Majestic? A: Corey is.

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

What did the guy say when he came out of the closet? Where's my green shirt?

Taxes are like prostitutes. The higher your salary, the more you pay.

What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

- What do you call a black pirate? + A Nig-ARRRRRRRRRR - No, a pirate you fucking racist

What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

Dont follow this link.......http://www.google.com/imghp?hl=en&q=blue+waffle&tab=wi

How do you make a plumber cry You kill it's family

Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

What's black when its clean and white when its dirty? A black guy that rolls in flour.

How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself pink and throw green banana at her.

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? Neither one can ride a bicycle.

Q: What do you call a black man's car being egged? A: A Hate Crime

How many pancakes does it take to lift up a dog house? Silly goose, alligators can't fly!

what did one tornado say to the other? im dizzy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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