Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

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what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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Why are Asians so good at math? because of their work ethic and determination to become the best at everything.rice.

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Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

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What would Michael Jackson do on the Moon? Nothing. He's dead.

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Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers old man: hi old woman: i have alshemiers

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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What do you get if you cross a human and a cow? Arrested.

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

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Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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who sells coke and ruins lives? Vagina Parker

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If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

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toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

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why couldn't the little boy sleep? he was being tortured.

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why did Helen Keller cross the road? she didn't, she wasn't able to find it

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How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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