Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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What's sadder than a lost puppy? A dead puppy.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

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What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

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why did the girl stop laughing? there was nothing to laugh about.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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the best time to wear a striped sweater is all the time

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How did little Sally break her Nintendo DS? Her abusive father repeatedly abused her and punished her until she was thrown into a stone wall. As she went into the wall she crushed by another wall and broke the DS.

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The game.

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What do you get when you cross Michael Jackson? A collision, if Michael Jackson were alive.

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What's white and horny? a unicorn.

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Women's rights

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Dimes are silver Pennies are brass Why does your face look like an a**

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Why do jews love money so much? Because money is very valuable and everyone loves it.

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I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120 mph car crash

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That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

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what has genitial warts? me

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Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

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Why did the man throw a clock? In retaliation for his wife having thrown a vase at him. The couple has a history of domestic violence. More than one friend has suggested counselling.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sally. I don't know anyone by that name, please go away.

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Why did the stoner cross the road? He didn't. He was stoned

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops