Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

Did you hear about the guy who got run over? Me neither

what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

your mothers so blonde she has yellow hair.

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

I once did something.

Never go into your parents room with a blacklight.. -Ryan Vallee

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

An Asian man fails a math test

Q. How do you make your dog stop barking? A. Take it to the grocery store. Replace it with any popsicle in the fridge.

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

what goes round , and round , and croaks? a blender in a frog.

What do you call a man who has a camera? a cameraman

What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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