There are 3 guys named:Poop, Shut up and Manners. They all were speeding down the street, they took a sharp turn and Poop fell out of the back. A cop pulled them over while Manners got out to go get Poop. The cop says, "whats your name." "Shut up." "No seriously whats your name." "Shut up" he says a little bit harsher. "Wheres your manners?" the cop says. "Back there picking up Poop."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call white trash Garbage

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

thumb_up thumb_down +21

copy me and i will kill you

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are black violets are black We are all black?! SHIT IM COLOUR BLIND

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the rest of the kids during recess? Tiffany is a pencil.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Yo momma's so black, when yo poppa rides her, he says "Look! I'm Hiccup!"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

thumb_up thumb_down +21

your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: what do you call a man eating some chicken ? A: a hungry man (hahahahahahaha.......i should get a life)

thumb_up thumb_down +21

oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you wake a sleeping bear? Kick it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops