Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

A have a black guy in my family tree. He married my cousin a few years back

How do you know when you have had too much to drink? When you ran over 7 pedestrians and are lying in the back of a police vehicle

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

A guy walks into a bar, has a few drinks with his mates and gets highly intoxicated.

Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Where did Sarah go during the bombing? Everywhere.

Did you hear about the 4'10" psychic that escaped from prison? It's on the news! "Small Medium At Large."

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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