A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She compiled and saw the error of her ways.

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

What do you call a gynochologist named John? John

What do you call a bloody Jewish guy nailed to a piece of wood. Jesus

When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? there are more birds on that side

What did the Triceratops get for his birthday? Nothing. Dinosaurs are extinct.

Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

4 hours later.

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

why did the baby cross the road i tied it to the back of a car

why did Sarah fall out of the swing? she had no arms. Knock knock. who's there? not Sarah.

Why was Eight in court? He was involved in Nine's horrifying disappearance.

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

What is worse than a case of the flu? Finding a dead camel on the highway with a half eaten lollipop in its mouth.

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

Your mom is so dumb that all of society says she was poorly educated.

Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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