- Anti Joke

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

"My father walked out on me." "Oh that's strange because I saw him yesterday and he had no legs."

What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

Q: what do you call the green and the (stone eater) animal? A:the green and the (stone eater) animal

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Yo mamas so fat when she was standing on a scale a girl walked by and said hey thats my phone number! Yo mamas so fat she broke the family tree!

What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

69 want to hear a yo mama joke sure Your dad

Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

Q: How many licks does it take to the center of a tootsie pop? A: At least one.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

1.....2.....3.....boom you died

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.