the horse walks into the bar the bartender calls the pet control

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

30cm = 0,3meters

what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

A man walks into a bar and is promptly sent out because he is under the age of 21.

A pengiuin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

whats the difference between a white jew and a black jew the black jew is treated poorly and is sent to the back of the gas chamber

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

Why did the bear eat a group of children? It was hungry.

Why did Billy Bob kidnap Jamal? Because he finds the African American community fascinating and is unable to start up a regular conversation due to the over-amplified stereotype that rednecks usually kidnap and/or kill black people. Therefore, kidnapping Jamal was necessary so that he could have a conversation with him about his heritage and background.

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME THE GAME

“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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