Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

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A fat man walks into McDonald's and was then seen leaving 8 hours later as he finished his shift.

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What's comfy and easy to wear? Shorts.

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I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

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Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

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Why was the women not in the kitchen? Because she was probably doing something else

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Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps in the air? He lands.

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My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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Why did the girl drop her sucker? she was hit by a truck!

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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the more I study the more I know, the more I know the more I forget, the more I forget the less I know, why study?

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Ok so there were 2 white dudes telling black jokes...so one of the white dudes tells a joke to the other... 1st dude: what's brown and tall? 2nd dude: a tree 1st dude: no that scary black man who looks like he wants to beat us up.

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you cant spell slaughter withought laughter

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A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

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Why did the man fail to enter the CAPTCHA phrase correctly? Because he was actually a bot, and bots are typically prohibited from accessing information on most public web sites.

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69

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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