What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

Justin Beiber

Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

A black man and a mexican jump off a building at the same time, who lands first? Who cares?

Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

a boy jumps through a mirror and out a window then he fell so now he's dead.

Penis

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon... Michael Jackson has sex with little boys.

quinn knows four other quinns but he ruined my life so he tells me to stop because im ruining this website but i disagree and now he is trying to tell me a joke and im not listening he is still trying but i don't care because i hate him,

Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...