What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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Ich bin nicht der Anführer

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Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

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Q: What did the prostitute ask the officer? A: Where were you stationed? I have a lot of respect for our boys in the Middle East.

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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Why could a fat man not do a barrel roll? He has already to many rolls.

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How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

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a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

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Why do Mexican's wear pointy shoes? Because its part of their culture and is used as a sign of dignity when dancing to tribal music

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's worse than a man with AIDS? The fact that this is considered a joke.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get away from a gigantic tiger slowly stalking him

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops