A man walks into a bar. Of chocolate. Yummy!

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Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

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pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

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So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

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What's a fun place to visit on the weekend? Uranus.

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Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

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What starts with S and end in H-I-T? shit.

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Why did the fat guy ride his camel to the grocery store? Because he didn't want to walk to the grocery store

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There was once a guy who was so crazy...he was sectioned.

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What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

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What happens if you come across an elephant in the jungle?. You wipe it up What happens if an elephants comes across you in the jungle? Swim

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Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What did the blond say to the ginger Stop drop and roll your hairs on fire

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Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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Q: Whats blue and white and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A: A tree wearing a denim jacket.

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Ahmed walks into Abbar. He apologized and they both continued about their jobs as sales assistants at Pottery Barn.

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One time at band camp, I advanced my clarinet skill, which led me to have a good life.

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what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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