there are 2 muffins in an oven one says "man its hot in here" the other says "shut up i hate this joke"

Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

Why was the cancer ward sad? They just lost a patient who couldn't ward off cancer.

what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

How do you get a cat out of a tree? You throw a rock at it

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He didn't he was chicken

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

What's worse than a holocaust? two holocausts.

whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

Q: What happens when you sit in the middle of the road? A: You get hit by a car and die a horrible death as your family members mourn in the loss and remain sad forever.

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...