what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

There once was a man from Kentuckit, who like to dissapear with his dog and clean up the shit using a plastic bag and put it in the allocated public bin.

Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? lts of stuff like murder, rape, slavery, poverty, mindcontrol, mass genocide, the holocaust, racism, plagarism, physichal assault, war, terrorism, massacres, onsloughts, necrophillia, the dead rising, zombies, jokes on antijokes.com, awkward situations, dieing, cancer, ADHD, other mental illnesses, paint, the grim reaper, shinigami, stereotyping foreigners, prejudicism, bullying, armed robbery, hacking, viruses, incest, feral animals, getting lost in the forest, arsonry, pyromania, passing out in a bar, meeting a serial killer, and finding 2 worms in your apple.

Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your car repossessed.

A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

Knock Knock JUST OPEN THE FLIPPIN DOOR ALREADY! I DON"T NEED YOU TO KNOCK AND INTRODUCE YOURSELF EVERY TIME YOU COME TO MY HOUSE!!! Jeez...seriously

What's worse than finding out your dad has AIDS? Finding out your little brother also has it, but you and your mother don't.

How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

You know what happens when there's an awkward silence... Everyone feels a little bit uncomfortable for a brief moment in time.

Q: What do you call a girl who wears a tuxedo to prom? A: Comfortable with the way she looks.

Q: What's white, is Mel Gibson, and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree? A: Mel Gibson.

Why did the goat cross the street? It was running away from the Tsunami

There once was a man from Peru. Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. I shot him in the head. With a bullet made of lead. So now he's dead. No more eating of shoes.

Where was the declaration of independes? At the bottom

Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Having a Hippo give you head.

If your riding your bicycle down the railroad tracks and your wings fall off how much icecrea does it take to fill a upside down doghouse

Why could the red heading boy sing higher notes than the blonde headed boy? He was castrated at birth.

Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

What the hell are you doing?

Q. whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I dont jump on my trampoline with metal cleats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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