Q: What do you call justin bieber? A: gay

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Double-whammy

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

thumb_up thumb_down +29

you know what's worse than being grounded? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What is the difference between me and you? I am not readin this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +27

yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops