did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

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a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

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someone says they've been "dying laughing"... no they haven't; they're quite capable of still breathing and functioning in every day life.

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Ok so 3 guys walk into a bar... the fourth one ran.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

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Boy: Excuse me, do you have a cigarette? Man: First let me see your ID. Boy: I don't have an ID Man: Well, how much money do you have? Boy: 50 cents Man: Sorry, I don't have any cigarettes. Boy: Good job, I'm actually undercover cop and you sir are a good citizen for not giving a minor cigarettes. Man: Cool, do I get a reward? Boy: Yes, you will receive a good citizen award and free $50 coupon. Man: Thank you! Boy: Can I have a cigarette now? Man: I wasn't lying when I said I didn't have any cigarettes. Boy: Okay, have a nice day.

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

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Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

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If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

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Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

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What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms

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Q: What's black, long, and floppy? A: Black Licorice

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long mane?"

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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who let the dogs out my mom because they're fat and need exercise

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I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What do you call a Muslim that walks onto a plane? A passenger

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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