The Americans have just spent millions of dollars working on a pen that works in space. I would of just used a pencil.

Why was the curious black guy a good Lumberjack? He was always axin'.

my egg roll

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? Well, I couldn't understand them... It's hard to pronounce anything clearly when your mouth is full, which is why you don't eat and speak simultaneously.

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

Patient: "Doctor, I have a strawberry stuck in my bum" Doctor: "Well, that's an awfully peculiar place to keep a strawberry. What were you thinking?"

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

Will nearis is here! Get it

A lady walks into her bedroom and sees her boy friend having sex with another girl. She hears the phone ring and a voice says "your grandma died".

mom theres a naked old man outside my window and he stole dads ladder.

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

What is funnier than 24? The fact that you think numbers are funny?

What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

R: Caught my wife cheating the other night. P: You bitter? R: Yes. I am.

Why was little Tommy scared? Because he'd just been abducted by a psychopathic rapist.

What's the difference between Dick Cheney and Obama? When Obama shoots someone in the face it's bin Laden.

Aww, I knew you where a sweetheart at the core Nerochan, I mean I look up towards people that don't give a jack about what others think but I am not as good at it as you are. Now can you please spam that away like really quickly now?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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