Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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What's worse that pooping in your pants having someone see it

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Why did the gorilla have big nostrils? Because it was a trait passed on to him from his biological father.

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So, a man walks into a bar, and he ends up in intensive care, because the bar was very hot and gave him severe burns. He was on business in an industrial park.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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Why did the boy ask his dad for a phone? Because he had his head stuck up a sheeps bum

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Where's Wally? In a children's book.

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What did the joke say to the antijoke? Nothing.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? after approximately 10 seconds of looking back and forth left to right the chicken finally came to a realization that the road is clear and safe to cross.

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What happens when you shoot Chuck Norris? You go to jail.

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why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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What do a raven and a writing desk have in common? I have no idea.

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How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

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Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? There's a peephole on your door why don't you go ahead and look

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Why were The Beatles so popular? People across the world enjoyed their music.

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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What is your favorite color???? My mom I got u s o godd.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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