A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

Whats long and hard and women like to suck on them? A popsicle or long lollipop

If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

What's the difference between a pessimist and a magnet? One is made of flesh and can talk, think and do things. The other is made of metal and can only pull things towards itself or push them away. But strangely, the latter is a lot more welcome in most situations.

Bob Saget

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

I HATE G-SPOT AND BTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

What did the preist say to the other preist? 'hey! we're both preists!'

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Why didn't the Country club waiter enjoy iced tea? He's simply always had a preference for warm beverages. He assumes this goes back to his infant days when his mother would massage his belly with warm porridge.

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

What is green, dangorous, slow, defencive, and scared? A turtle with a uzi.

What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

Without geometry life would be pointless

Yo momma is so fat, her total body volume is slightly larger than a normally proportioned person of smaller mass!

What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

Q: What happened to the dog when he eat the banana? A: he got raped by a monkey...

Q- Where did Sally go during the explosion? A- Everywhere!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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