A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

SHE GOT A BIG BOOTY SO I CALL HER by her real name because she is a woman and worthy of my respect.

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

What's worse than rain on your wedding day? You scheduling your wedding to be held on an aircraft carrier on december 7th 1941.

haha look at that guys shirt! what's wrong with it? i don't know.. nothing i guess

Whats the difference between a lamp and Morgan Freeman? Alot

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Dead babies can't paint.

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

How did the little boy get down from the top of the empire state building... He took the elevator

When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

on a scale from a banana to a pound coin - how much do you like the works of antonio vivaldi?

How many Jews can you fit in a car? Statistically speaking, in a brief survey done by the United States Traffic Commission, they stated that a standard 4-door sedan had the highest percentile of drivers. So, in regards to the legal system, a person may only fit, in fact, 5 jews in a car.

How many people does it take to light a fag? I love BBW porn!!!!

A Jew walks into a bar........... he buys it.

A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

why did the boy drop his icecream?? he got hit by a bus

Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

Do u know where the glue is? nope, i just glued my hand to this table, so im no help to u

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...