Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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what did the bull say when it got shot? nothing... its a bull

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Why do white people not eat crackers? Cause it's cannabalism.

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What did the penguin say to the other penguin? Nothing, penguins don't talk.

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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A man walks into a bar and sees two girls making out. He orders a drink and leaves.

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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Why did the turtle fall out of the car? It forgot to buckle up

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A friend? Just a friend that you told to stop pretending to be me? And you had no idea whatsoever that I am Nero as in not one of the six hundred thousand wabbabes?

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms! Knock knock! Who'z there? Not Suzy.

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Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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