What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

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Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Hello? Prankster: Hello is your regrigerator running? Randomly Dialed Homeowner: Yes... Prankster: Oh good. I was just calling to make sure. Have a good day!

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soccer

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Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

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What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

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What is the difference between green and desert sage? About 20 bucks a gallon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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what did the surfer do on his computer? browse the internet

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man. The mexican got his arms shot off in the war and is severely paralyzed. God Bless our troops. Thank you for serving us.

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Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

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What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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I named my cat Pounce because she jumps. In retrospect I suppose most cats do jump, in fact, they are even known for it.

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What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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What does bigfoot have? Big feet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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