"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Why is there a man painted green throwing forks at me

Row, row, row your... Canoe.

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

What's the capital of Ohio? O

Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

Legal Mexicans in Texas

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

i'll leave 'em dead in the living room. get it leave 'em dead in the living room

how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

saftey torch you can out it on the porch. saftey torch put it in the hallway. saftey torch scare the monsters away. saftey torch that'll be 50 bucks.

What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

G

Knock Knock. Who's there? Frances. Frances who? Frances Payne.

What did the biscuit say when he saw his friend get run over? Oh my god. Dave, are you ok? Somebody call an ambulance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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