A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead."

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A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

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People are a lot like slinkies. Not really good for anything, but still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

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Two drums and a sybol fall off the edge of a cliff. They hit a random pedestrian at the bottom killing him instantly. da-dum ch

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A man walks into a bar, he says ouch.

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How do you kill a dead baby? You can't, it's already dead.

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Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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What's faker than a rich mexican? A unicorn smoking weed

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relatable: school : 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: oscer has 4 apple his train was 7 min early now caulate the mass of the sun

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What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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Your momma is so dumb, she failed the IQ test.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy launched a flare. Nobody came.

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What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

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Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

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"Have you seen the food African kids eat?" "No.." "NEITHER HAVE THEY!!"

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What mouse walks on 2 legs, Micky mouse. What duck walks on 2 legs, All ducks you dip shit.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? A little boy who can't reach the doorbell.

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A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What will it be?" The homeless man says, "Nothing. I have no money."

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Whats the difference between a Cadillac and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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Two men walk into a bar, one ducks

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What did the lawyer name his daughter? Nothing. The lawyer is sterile and can never have children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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