what do you call aca that got pushed in a pool ? A WET PUSSY

just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

What do Robbers Get for Christmas? Other peoples things.

When I was just a little kid, my daddy lest the house and we all joined him to wherever he wanted to live.

How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? It's a trick question. Feminists can't change anything.

Q; How does a priest perform an exorcism? A: He doesn't.

How do you get a mexican to do the yard work faster? Offer him a 5% bonus.

What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

the duck walked in the bar then he walded away

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

Whats better than Anti-jokes? Mtiscape.com

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

Why do Mexicans always have heart burn? Because the food is spicy.

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why didn't the blonde finish her book? She died.

Ya Mums so fat when she stood on the scales it came up with my phone number

Guess who thinks your pretty? Hellen Keller

Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

Why did the boy eat the worm? Because his parents were starving him, and it was all he had.

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

You are driving a canoe home when the wheels suddenly fall off. How many pancakes does it take to fill a doghouse?

A duck walks passed a lemonade stand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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