Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? Because he has no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many easily offended people does it take to change a light bulb? Shut up, that's not funny!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You life story is the perfect cure for insomnia. [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you get when you mix a dog and a fish? A hot fillet.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

There are two cows standing in a field eating grass. The first cow says "moo", the second cow says "Thats funny, I was about to say that".

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then transported by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their eventual mass execution.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the 3 year old high He was flying

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What if someone sold your socks to a Jew? I would blackflip through the air and shit on his chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I dont know so why are you asking?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

penis?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do a pizza man and a gynecologist have in common? They are both hardworking members of the community!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

DING DONG! Did you have to ring the doorbell? You just ruined a good knock knock joke!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? this overused joke

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mother is so fat, she tried to suicide because she was unhappy with her weight. She tried a diet and it didn't work; she suffers from depression and went to see a doctor about her weight. Life is getting worse for your mother and she is starting to develop diabetes. Your relatives and cousins are going to the hospital to visit her sometime this week; the doctor says she only has about a week left before she passes away.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops