What do you call a red light A:soon to be green

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Wanna hear something half funny 34.5

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

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Two Black men, one wearing a blue shirt, and one wearing a red shirt, Jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? The one in the blue shirt

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There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

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Whats long and hard and women like to suck on them? A popsicle or long lollipop

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are you gay does your mom know

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How many arabs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. We also have a black president.

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People with cancer.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Who would win Coolio or Vannlia Ice? nieth because Chuck Norris did a round house kick.

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What is the difference between a duck? one of its legs is both the same.

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What's a cow's fovorite vacation spot? Farmyard animals do not receive vacations, they have long hours, no pay, and get eaten upon death.

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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wht does a blonde do with a box of crayons? eat a taco.

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How do you drown a fish? You can't , it is physically Impossible to drown a fish. because they have gills, so they are able to breathe underwater.

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What did Edward Cullen say to the hot girl? Since I am a vampire it is impossible for me to get an erection.

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I walked into temptation yesterday, He said hi.

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roses are red violets are blue I hear a bus...

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mark lawson likes boys

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops