What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

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Y

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

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Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

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What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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My name is Harry.

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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whats funnier than a dead musim? a guy who begs a girl to go out with him for 16 hours

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.........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................00............................................................................................................................................I..........................................................................................................................................._____....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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So three Jews walk into a Biker Bar. Despite the fact that is was a self-proclaimed "Biker Bar", the group of men inside were in fact rather open-minded, and had no issues with new members. They had a rich conversation, and frequented the bar thereafter.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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Roses are red violents are blue I have 5 figures and the middle one is for you

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I just drank a cola.

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't rhyme F*ck it

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I work at jcpenny

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A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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Why did Alex fall off the swing? he had no arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops