Whats Do You call people, on the top floor of a Double-Decker bus? Passengers

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say cheese

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-What's the worst part about killing a baby? -Probably either recieving the death sentence or living psychologically scarred in prison for life.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Whats white and sticky fluff

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A blond and a brunette are on the moon. The brunette says to the blond "I'm glad that independent company's are taking the job of American space travel."

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Why was Chris crying? There was a robbery at his house and both of his parents were brutally murdered.

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How much Is a free app on my market?

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Billy: You're so ugly you made an onion cry! Jack: I'm rubber and you are glue, whatever you say bounces back and sticks to you. Billy was so upset at what he said and decided to leave.

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What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

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Why was the gay kid beaten to death Because he was also an outstanding racist and lived in a highly populated african american community.

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whats the difference of the mexican and the bench the mexicans alive

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road? To get to the other side.

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Why doesn't Charlie Sheen take showers? Because he spends too much time on MySpace.

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P.E.N.I.S P-enis E-nis N-is I-s S

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what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of problems with money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Why did the guy get hit by a bus? He walked out into traffic.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

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what is sticky and brown?a stick

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? No. Well neither did she.

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I have a black man in my family tree... He's still hanging there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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