How do you unclog a toilet? You call a plumber.

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Boss: Do you know what lazy means? Employer: Yes, adopting a child.

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

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A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

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A black man, a Mexican man, and an Asian man all walked into a bar. They proceeded to have a good time together as they were celebrating their graduation from medical school.

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Why did the man order fried chcken? I have twelve dead babies in my trunk.

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set an alarm for a reasonable hour.

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whats black and white? a zebra

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Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

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Why did the white guy sit on the bench while the black guys were playing basketball? His mother was calling, and his AP scores were coming in that day. Those scores were important to him.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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why did the puppy poop? he had too

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what did meredith and nick have in common an i

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Why are all Asians smart? Not all of them are, Asians are stereotypically smart because their parents most likely grew up in an under-developed country and want their children to be successful because they don't want their children to experience what they did.

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A man with tourettes walks into a bar, due to his disease he shouts unexpected profanities across the room; everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the pressure anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom and pulls out a gun and points it at his head. HIs wife of 15 years walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to conceive. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man diagnosed with touretts then goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. After he killed everybody he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentanced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man with touretts still cannot control his ticks and rots in jail everyday screaming obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Why did the man not want to be a tree? Because he didn't want to.

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A white rapper. HAHAHAHAHAHA oh ya he was muslim.

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WNBA

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A guy walks into a bar, but a metal bar, he hurts his head, he goes to the hospital to get an x-ray, Turns out he hard a brain tumor, He died the next day,

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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Racecar is spelled the same forwards and backwards. Masturbation does not work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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