Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

What's funnier than 24? 9/11

A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

Why did the man have a bad day? Well first of all, his wife left him, then his two kids both committed suicide, then a large falcon pecked at him genital area. After that he proceeded to be hit by a car, and soon after he was hit by a bus. Following this, his corpse was raped by a transvestite pig, and then finally his spirit got hit by a plane on its way up to heaven, knocking it to Hell.

What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

How do you kill a domb blond? Shoot her in the head.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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