What do an eagle and a off-white light bulb have in common? Nothing.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

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Why did a blond killed herself? She couldnt find a corner in a round room.

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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Two men walk into a bar The first man says to the bartender: 'Can I have a glass of H2O?' The second man says: 'Can I have a glass of H2O too?' The Bartender gives them both glasses of water because he is not irresponsible to serve hydrogen peroxide in his bar.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

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The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

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What's round and cheesy? A cheese wheel.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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what can you blow up and sleep with at night? An air mattress

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Mommy how come daddy went to the doctors today? Well sweetie, honestly daddy wanted me to shove things up his ass And I refused to so he went to the doctors so they can do it...

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roses are red that fact is true but violets are violet not fu***** blue

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mohammed ali walks into a bar, gets a drink, signs a few autographs , and a good time is enjoyed by all.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops