Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

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why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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Q: what's yellow and can't use chopsticks. A: corn

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WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side!

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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What did the boy say after he stubbed his toe? Owww! I wanna have sex!!!

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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What is the difference between a black person and a pizza? Nothing, they both taste like chicken

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, what can I get you?" He is then checked into the psychiatric ward at the local hospital, for talking to a duck.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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