Who is big and stupid My brother

What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

i saw amango it splootered

What do you call a person driving a plane? Not a pilot, they fly planes.

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

what would happen if every overweight person in america jumped at the same time? they would all get a little exercise.

Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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